"I'm sure it goes without saying that I have been hurting over these holidays... my boys have been hurting, my ex has been hurting, the family is hurting. I do hope Ayn was able to find some happiness today, I hope she was sufficiently distracted to recall the nightmare she is trapped within. I cannot, in fact I would not forget even if I could. I need to know this feeling. Each Christmas around the world people gather together for gift giving and great meals. They tell stories, share laughter and embrace those they hold dearest. These are days I do not get back.... ever. I can and will be having great celebrations upon Ayn's return however these days are gone...nearly 200 now.
Child Protection Services is not a person. It is a faceless abstract created by us, the people whom it supposed to serve. We create and fund an entity like this under the notion that children need to be protected, but that is where it ends for most of us, with a notion. We do not read the laws. We do not learn the policies. We do not examine audits. In short we do not take the time to see if it is working. We rest on the assumption that because its purpose was pure and its function is good that everything must be okay. Well it’s not okay!
I still have two children and now I have the knowledge that there exists this institution which can march in and kidnap your child at the whim of someone who does not even know you. This is not something that sits well with me. When MCFD took my daughter I didn't know what to do. I only knew that it was wrong. I love my children and would never harm them. I have sought to learn the most I can about their disability and to try to understand them and how best to treat them, but child protection workers still took her anyway. They did not spend an hour of thought on my daughter or my family but felt that they had the authority to do us. I am fairly certain that they cannot keep her forever, but that may simply be me turning to another societal institution and its underlying notion upon which it was founded... Justice.
Please have a Merry Christmas everyone. Do not lament in my sadness but rather find in it a reason to share your joys and loves with others whom you find worthy of it. Cherish them and each moment you have together. Time is fleeting but our love does not have to be fleeting. Thank you so much everyone, enjoy your holidays. I am going to go and hug my boys and look at pictures of my baby girl."