Wednesday, April 7, 2010

LISTEN TO THE COMMENTS - PLEASE LISTEN / Part 160 / For Love and For Justice / Zabeth and Paul Bayne/

Listen to the Comments – Please listen to the Comments

In our communities parents whose own lives, temperaments, emotions and values are confused, even loathsome, cannot care for the children they have conceived. As a society we must act to provide the protection, love and opportunity these children deserve. We elect government and legislators to commission services to accommodate our high ideals for this vulnerable generation in whom we invest our futures.

That’s an essential element of the Ministry of Children and Family Development’s mandate. A tragic corollary of this terrifying responsibility is the mounting family wreckage that MCFD is generating.

I am humbled by the eloquence spoken in broken prose that come from broken hearts. They have pulsed for some time now in the comment sections of my blog posts. I have been writing with compassion for two parents, only to find that there are two thousand or more others without voices. Seldom do channels of communication speak for them. Their stories are deemed not to be big enough. An earthquake however is big. A drug related slaying is. A mine disaster is. A college basketball victory is. Yet the stories of these disenfranchised parents are titanic. Above its foundations our provincial government has an unsteady Ministry – the Ministry of Children, and that should be worrying responsible people. If this is not a public narrative now, before long these silent voices will blast the confidentiality of their untold stories. The fear of repercussions will give way to a rush to be heard.

Paul and Zabeth and the multitude have dissimilar stories but their refrain is disturbingly identical, like pointing fingers becoming arrows aimed at what the lyrics say is a heart-less service agency. Read back through the comments and you will hear the loudest song of sorrow you have ever heard. Sorrow that is expressed angrily because of helplessness to right the wrongs over which they have no control. Sorrow that is a chorus of cries for help.

8 comments:

  1. You have seen through the anger and saw sorrow. You have rightly interpreted the frustration and helplessness of parents whose hearts have been scarred with one of the deepest wounds. You have identified with those who are hurting. You have had compassion and reached out. You are their voice and means to be heard.

    Thank you from Paul and I. Thank you from all the hurting families in BC and everywhere.

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  2. You summarized beautifully. I feel such a sense of injustice for the Bayne's and other families (as well as my sisters) who are going through this pain. And it is a deep sadness more than anything. I DO hope and pray that change will happen and that these families are listened to...

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  3. Very well said, Ron. And thank God, and thank goodness, for those who are speaking out.

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  4. I have been helped my MCFD in the past and I thought of them as a friendly entity. Then I experienced another side last Fall. Because I had been given free daycare when I was struggling (I have 6 kids and at one time I had 3 kids in 2 years and was on my own then), I was also given help when I had my 5th child, from the social worker in the hospital. Then, a nasty call came in that stated I had neglected my daughter. It was not proven true and I am not yet ready to give the details as it is still on my plate, yet I was put through court and all kinds of threats. I was so scared and still am. I did to lose my kids but I was threatened with that so many times. I realized that things have changed. All the past help I voluntarily accepted and the courses I took to be a better parent were now stated as protection intakes. It is not true. And many other things now on legal record about me are also not true. I was not/ will not ever have a chance to set things straight. I have also very bad collateral reports on my file from people who do not even know me who were phoned about me. I appreciate you are giving a voice to how this is not right.

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  5. A father committed to his children says:

    Parents wrongly accused of abusing their own children who are then removed must fight back and later tell others of their progress and successes as well as their failures.

    Parents don't need to personally show or write about sorrow or tears that a vindictive social workers would want to see. Supporters of parents can instead write about the rage and frustration they should be feeling, but instead convey these parents have unwavering committment to their children. This is all that I have personally seen the Baynes demonstrate.

    Follow the Baynes' family example, and do not let anyone take your children and think that you are powerless to do anything about it. The child protection industry would not be able afford to carry on in the same manner as it does if every parent fought back as hard and publicly as the Baynes are doing.

    Pray instead for the lost souls who work for child protection who know it is wrong to remove children from their families without just cause. These people can joint the ranks of those who choose to abuse their authority such as is the case within the Catholic church, the teaching profession or coaching, to name a few.

    People who join the child protection profession so they can abuse their authority are the ones who must be removed from service and be held high as an example of unacceptable practice.

    I personally believe that no social worker without a family and at least ten years of experience has any business removing children from their parents without a warrant or benefit of other due process.

    Perhaps the reason the anguish of parents and their children at the hands of child protection authorities continutes and has gone on for so long is similar to why people in authority and positions of trust such as catholic priests, teachers, coaches and other positions get away with mistreating children. It is because of the deafening silence from victims as well as silence from so-called child protection agencies that should have been involved early on. Child protection social workers appear to prefer "easy targets," people and children with little money and small voices who don't, or can't fight back.

    Parents need to document the wreckage of their family by child protection employees and third parties, and publish it as the Baynes have done. Parents need to protect themselves and the future of their children following through with their attempts to hold those individuals responsible.

    Parents need to personally hold those misguided individuals accountable for their actions and make the price of their misdeeds as high as possible for the organizations who employ them. Publicly funded organizations who choose to turn a blind eye to the actions of their employees, while reaping the windfall of taxpayer dollars associated with each child removed need an education in accountability.

    Take a page from MCFD's own unwritten handbook on how to aggravate and disrupt parents lives by launching a lawsuit and use it to document the actions of individual social worker or any other third party who has negatively impacted our family.

    Win or lose, the conclusion of a lawsuit becomes ammunition for the the next affected parent to use to improve their chances of success.

    Police are gradually learning this lesson of accountability that social workers have not yet experienced. Police are now finding out their every move is being recorded, videotaped and embarrassingly published on youtube.com.

    Parents need to arm themselves with video-recording cell phones and record meetings with social workers. The right minute-long video clip can have a far greater corrective effect than hundreds of pages of blogs.

    Respond in person and publicly to child proteciton authorities with dignity and committment to the future of your, and your neighbor's children. This will clarify in any observer's mind what is right, and what is wrong about the child protection industry.

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  6. To Anonymous:

    Speaking of recording SW, are you aware that some parents are searched before seeing their children? Your advice may prompt them into making an unspoken policy to search parents. Be mindful that Big Brothers are watching this blog like hawks. Do they have this authority to search? No. But they can terminate visitation or impose harsher terms on supervision order if parents refuse to be searched. Don't forget that they are experts in extortion.

    To victims who share the Christian faith, I suggest that you should read Psalms 59:

    "Take me out of the hands of the cruel ones, O my God; keep me safe from those who come up against me. Take me out of the power of the workers of evil, and keep me safe from the men of blood."

    One day, God will unleash His wrath, takes their names off His book of life and let them perish in hell with Satan.

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  7. The comments of the committed father are so right!! It is exciting see how interest in the Baynes has gained momentum these last months.
    It is exciting that so many, many Canadians are lifting our faces from self interest to see the shocking injustice fellow Canadians are experiencing. The tenacity of the Baynes in fighting for their family is heartwarming and we enthusiastically applaud them. It must be shocking to those who customarily mow down ordinary little people while hiding behind the power of their authority and office.
    When friends and supporters make the trek to a courtroom over and over to watch the proceedings, this is not lost on the court's participants. While there, observers learn that the Baynes have never been charged with anything. The police interrogated them but refused to lay charges because they found no grounds for a charge (sound familiar?). These observers also learn that the MCFD accusers admit to lying and breaking laws so they can retain their children.
    The Baynes have learned through an horrendous struggle to use the media to advantage--youtube.com, tv news, blogs, fb, public rallies, fundraisers and their frank openness. This couple is a powerful example and an encouragement for others to follow.
    We Canadians have too long believed that peers, chosen and appointed from among peers, can execute justice without accountability to the public. They are only our peers. They are not different from their peer group. I think many of us have been taught and have believed that it is necessary and right to trust authorities ---but for the rare scoundrel that sneaks in there. It just isn't true!! All public officials must be made accountable and it seems to be necessary that their peers are part of the process.
    Almighty God is the source of true justice and it is exciting to be invited together to seek His direct intervention through the invitation to special times of prayer. Thanks, Paul and Zabeth

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  8. After reading through all of the comments today, a thought struck me. You may or may not appreciate it. On Sunday, a woman shared something during testimony time at our church. She suggested rather than railing against or challenging government, which is often on an 'Everest'sized scale of obstacles, we should pray for the hearts of all people who are adversaries to be changed. Once the heart of the nation shifts, the government seems to follow. We have witnessed great change through the prayer and commitment of Faytene Kryskow and her entourage of young people in Ottawa. Prayer, prayer, prayer. Please do not read anything into this that would lead you to believe that I am missing the magnitude of injustice here, with the Bayne family's battle. I have been following this for quite some time and do comment occasionally. I appreciate all of the comments I have read here today, I may not agree wholeheartedly with each point, but my overall observation is one of solidarity. Solidarity, faith, and commitment. We must maintain this. For all families. I stand with you. Praise God for His mercy, wisdom and power. Let's continue to push forward and watch the wall crumble.....

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